JR’s ‘Phone Wars’

Guest post by: JR from Wodonga

I press the buttons for the number, select call, put the handset up to my ear and wait … the respondent announces words to the effect of, “Thank you for calling John P Bloggs & Co. (or whatever), Sharon speaking”. Now, at this point in time, I could have sworn I heard her speak, so why does she need to tell me she’s speaking? I’M NOT ENTIRELY DEAF!

Bundanoon’s ban on bottled water

Bundanoon seems similar to Bright - in more ways than one.

Town’s decision based on revenge and small-town mentality accidentally puts it on the map!

The national & international media is abuzz with the news  that the  tiny NSW Southern Highlands tourist town of Bundanoon has voted to ban the sale of bottled water, attracting attention from around the world.

While ostensibly the decision was made on ‘environmental’ and altruistic grounds, what the rest of the world does not yet realise is that the ‘ban’ seems to have come about as an act of malice and revenge against a company wishing to set up a new business and several shops in the town of just 2,500 people.

Who cares?

Later today the Williams sisters, Venus & Serena, will meet in the Wimbledon tennis final … for the fourth time!

What is wrong with womens’ tennis? These two have been around forever, Venus moves with all the grace of an ageing giraffe and Serena has the world’s largest arse, yet they’re still at the top.  

I have no idea who will win or who has won the most of their encounters. And I don’t care. I won’t be watching the most boring tennis final of all time. Why bother?

Help!

Outlook problem

(UPDATE: Problem fixed. I hired a ‘geek’ and he found a command to restore the settings – nothing else worked. I’ve never had a problem with Outlook before. Thanks everyone for your assistance)

I’m having a problem opening my Microsoft Outlook 2007 program, for emails. It starts to launch but then I get a pop-up saying, “Cannot open Outlook Window”.

Buggered if I can find any answers from Microsoft. Any ideas? Assistance greatly appreciated – free A.O. membership offered.

Lleyton Hewitt – so wrongly maligned

At least 'The Fanatics' love him. Well, they know how much heart he has.

It never ceases to amaze (and disappoint) me just how much Australians dislike their own Lleyton Hewitt. Yet anyone who has followed his progress into the quarter finals of the current Wimbledon tournament would have to agree he is playing impeccable tennis and, not only that, he is clearly handling himself as a great ambassador for this country.

Jacko dead

From the Herald Sun:

Michael Jackson has died following a suspected cardiac arrest. Paramedics reportedly performed CPR on the 50-year-old singer while transporting him to hospital in Los Angeles, but reports claim they never managed to get a pulse.

Comment: I guess he stopped, because he had enough.

The death of blogging

Biggest news story of the year Twittered away

It’s official, blogging is dead. Or at least it has reached the end of any useful life as far as providing lively forums for discussion of important issues. And I blame Twitter.

Whose tat’s that?

Talk about 'wearing your heart on your sleeve'! Click on photo to enlarge (the zit).

And what is the worst feature of this picture?:

• The tattoo
• The arm it’s on
• The ‘zit’
• The blue singlet (over another singlet?)
• The (partly obscured) beard or,
• That rug on his chest!

And no, it’s not me, it’s ……………..

It takes one to know one

Herald Sun website heading corrected ~ they'd spelt it "Morans".

Fly Jetstar? Not me

They should rename it 'Sh*tstar' airlines.

If you want proof that passengers opting to fly on budget airline Jetstar are treated as second-class citizens look no further than this story  about how today (Wednesday) a routine Sydney to Melbourne flight turned into an eight-hour, 3700km journey for about 130 Jetstar passengers

We’re right under the major flight paths here in Bright and in the morning I noticed a lot of  circular vapour trails in the sky indicating planes being made to circle while they waited for the Melbourne fog to clear. Not so for lowly Jetstar, who were ordered to divert 1400km north to Brisbane.

The flight departed Sydney at about 7.30 am but did not arrive in Melbourne (Avalon) until 3.30pm with passengers having to sit in the A320 Airbus for more than eight hours. And all they got was a bread roll and a soft drink. Stuff Jetstar, they treat their passengers like shit; I’d rather pay just a few dollars more and fly Virgin, which has to be the best airline in the country.

The scums behind the slums

OK, if they didn't smoke maybe they could afford better accommodation, but these poor souls are just being taken advantage of.

The more we advance the more we leave others behind

This report in The Sunday Age  about how four Melbourne businessmen scumbag criminals are exploiting the most vulnerable in our society sickens me. If you haven’t read it I strongly suggest you do.

It might make you feel sorry or it might make you feel angry. Hopefully though, it will also make you feel something needs to be done about these arseholes, John Pisani, George Maatouk, Arthur “Arty” Oshan and Joe Tomarchio.

Pisani and his co-shitheads are making a fortune out of the misery of others by leasing cheap, low-end properties and then renting rooms out to those poor sods unable to get better accommodation. Typically their ‘tenants’ have no money for a bond, no references or are unemployed or on benefits. Many are mentally ill. The rent is deducted from their benefit allowances and/or forced out of them in cash:

Swine flu parties

Let’s spread it around ~ what a great idea!

It’s hard to believe this news story  :

“The federal government has warned against people attending swine flu parties to catch the virus and develop immunity before it can mutate into a more severe form.”

T-shirt logos

Would you be caught dead wearing one of these 'D from A' T-shirts?

Name the best & worst

I own a lot of T-shirts (about 60). In my line of business I don’t have much call to wear normal shirts with collars (except for polo Ts), so I’ve accumulated quite a few but let me tell you something:

Not one of my T-shirts has a logo on it!

In fact I hate logos on my clothing and I refuse to buy anything that is either an advertisement for some product, band, event or cause, or (worse still) that carries some smart arse comment like “Chill out dudes”. Well, there are some that carry a small logo of the maker’s brand like Diadora, Country Road and, er, Golden Breed (yes, they still make them!) but that’s hardly the same.

But Dave from Albury only has T-shirts that carry logos

Any suggestions?

I’ve got a real problem here. Tomorrow is my sister Lynda’s *0th birthday and I’ve been invited to lunch (and I HAVE to go).

What’s the problem? Well she recently moved from the swine flu-free, leafy eastern suburbs of Melbourne to … the WESTERN side !!!

I’m taking a face mask, but what other precautions should I take?

Exocet missile required

The Pacific Dawn 'swine flu' cruise ship. Just blow it up.

 Swine flu hits the north east. About 20 cases of swine flu have now been detected in this region – in Berrigan, Beechworth & Mansfield. In all cases the ‘victims’ were either passengers from the Pacific Dawn or had contact with other passengers. Why did they ever let it dock? PS: Those towns are nowhere near Bright!